"I've been thinking about something, do you think it's too soon to be hitting on Mrs. Eliot Spitzer?" --David Letterman
"But here's the lesson, ladies and gentlemen, this is why I always wear a fake mustache and pay cash." --David Letterman
"Maybe some of you don't know the story, today Eliot Spitzer admitted publicly that he was involved in a prostitution ring, which means Hillary Clinton is now only the second angriest wife in the state of New York." --Jay Leno
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